Monday, October 18, 2010

Last "feelings" post

Alright guys I promise this will be the last one about my feelings, I'll try my best to continue stories tomorrow if I can. Anyways, let's begin.

So I woke up this morning after only two hours of sleep. Sleep definately isn't coming easy to me. I haven't eaten since it happened a few days ago. I also turned down a few offers to go out and hang out with people because I didn't want to bring the mood of those people down too. I tried just forgetting about it, but there's no way that will solve anything quickly. I tried doing other things that make me happy, but they just depress me because we used to do them together. I think my mom has set something up with a therapist. I used to go to therapy when I was younger because I have been through two suicides, both girlfriends at the time. On top of that, and my father doing five months ago I'm pretty numb.

I don't really know if she'll come back. Frankly I'm not sure I should even wait for something that probably won't happen. Yeah I miss her a lot, but she really hurt me. And I'm afraid if she came back I'd feel differently about her because of how much she hurt me. She still never gave me a reason as to why she left, so I have no closure. But from what I understand there's no other guy involved, she just got tired of me I guess.

Anyways, I feel pretty alone. Hung out with my brother and played some halo, that helped temporarily but after about two hours I just starting getting down again. I tried eating earlier and just threw it all back up (sorry if that's gross.) Tried reading my favorite book and I lost interest. I guess I just wanted to vent to someone, and my audience here is a good a place as any. Thanks for those of you who read this whole passage, I really appreciate knowing that some of you will.

Take care everyone.

36 comments:

  1. hey man just think, hope, wish, and act like things will get better and they usually do.

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  2. Been in a very similar place myself recently man. The only advice I can give is to spend time with people.

    It ONLY gets EASIER from here dude

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  3. just started reading and I just wanted to say hang in their and writing is a great way to let it out, if you decide to keep writing about your feelings I will still read!

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  4. Deep dude, feel for you, keep your chin up

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  5. Like I said on the last post, it's a natural process. Feel it out and use positive outlets to vent the dysphoria.

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  6. I'm in a similar bot. keep your head up, man. I'll definitely be checking in.

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  7. Women are fickle. Try not to think about it as her getting tired of you, just think of it as something that didn't pan out.

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  8. woman are fickle, switch teams

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  9. man i really hope you get better.

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  10. things happen as they should... just keep on keepin' on and you'll be fine

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  11. I really hope everything turns out alright =[

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  12. good luck man, you should see it through

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  13. It'll all get better man, don't feel sad. Always look forwards to the future and everything will be ok.

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  14. you'll be fine after you get through this

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  15. cool man... blogging is a good way to vent

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  16. just try and think positive. Your friends are reaching out to you, dont let those offers go.

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  17. Take it one day at a time. Thats the best you can do.

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  18. this is the moment where you bounce back up.. keep thinking positive

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  19. you can talk about your feelings as much as you want ^^

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  20. Things will get better. Positive outlook and strength of will is the way to go.

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  21. I always love reading your post's... ;3

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  22. you should dress nice go out and find another girl who is better! go now!! GO!!!

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  23. My brothers ex-girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend after 3 years of them being together.. he was quite torn apart as well, but his life has come back up again!

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  24. Darkest before the dawn bro, love hurts too much of the time

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  25. better off without her man. keep your chin up

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  26. Keep your head up dude, been there myself and can assure you it gets better.

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